NUNEATON MOUNTAINEERING CLUB

NEWSLETTER

January 2005

 

CONTENTS

All the wildlife of the Serengeti including Lyons and Gazelles. Cabinet jumping!  Jet propelled walking!

Sheep wrestling!  Guessing Karen’s age?  Wot no custard!  What readers really, really think?

And much, much more.

 

MEMBERSHIP 2005

If you haven’t yet renewed your subscription to Nuneaton Mountaineering Club this will be the final newsletter you will receive this year.  Subscriptions should be sent to Nick Barr (see Contacts list) ASAP.

We hope you will continue to be one of our members, but if not, and there are some points or issues you would like to raise, then please contact me or any other committee member either through the website or the contact list.

 

WHAT YOU THE READERS SAID

Andrew Holder wrote to say:  I enjoyed the newsletter, and passed it on to a pig-farmer friend of mine who said, "This is the sort of thing I dig." - praise indeed!

(Many thanks for those kind words. Ed.)

It’s even better on a second reading! – Andrew.  (Just how many times has he read it?)

A good read – Rachel. (Possibly an involuntary action uttered when she wasn’t really thinking)

I must congratulate Colin on this newsletter – Matt. (Does Matt have a drink problem?)

I’m Colin J Green and I endorse this Newsletter - The Editor.

A ripping yarn of epic proportions reminiscent of the very best of the Dunkirk spirit – Mona Green. (Thanks Mum)

 

Andrew also spotted two typos.  (Spelling mistakes actually)  Interestingly, these may well be a feature of future editions, and are there to test your powers of observation!  For the record they were:

Stationary – which should have been stationery.          It was Nick wot writ this.

Daring do – which should have been derring-do.          All my own work.

Also, Michele reported that Nick’s e-mail address was incorrect.  Even Nick didn’t manage to find this one – and with all his forensic auditing skills too.

 

EDITORIAL Colin

Happy New Year, Ho Ho Ho and Bah Humbug.  May 2005 be an interesting and safe one for all.

The views and opinions in this Newsletter are not necessarily those of the committee or club and it should be assumed that any heading without a name should be attributed to the Editor.

Please, please send in copy for the Newsletter and make sure you have your say on the contents.  At least the editor will then know you’re reading it.  Snippets are just as welcome as longer pieces and come in very handy for filling those annoying gaps at the bottom of the page.  If you don’t wish to write, then at least keep your editor up to speed with what’s going on so that all the latest news and information can be shared.

The Newsletter is written in Word, Times New Roman.  Electronic copy please from everybody who is on the internet, but I’ll take other formats from those without a computer.  Also, please don’t format contributions unnecessarily, as I wish to give the Newsletter a standard look.

Contributions to Colin at any Thursday meeting.  Many thanks.

 

PLANNING MEETING

This was held on Thursday 25^th November to which you were all invited to have your say.  What we came up with is reproduced below.  I hope you will all be able to support as many of the events as possible. If it does not represent what you would like to do then make sure to speak up at the club, through these pages or at the next planning meeting later in the year.

 

BMC NOTICES   Andrew

I get a number of e-mails from the BMC - mainly concerning local meetings.  Sometimes these are only days away, so there is no time to put the message on our notice board or bring it to a Thursday-night meeting.

If you are interested I can pass on these e-mails to you as they come in. Just let me have your e-mail address and I'll put you on the forwarding list.

SNOW MEET JANUARY 15^th – 16th   David
Details of January snow meet are as follows:

Camp in Great Langdale at the National Trust camp site. 

Evening refreshments at the Old Dungeon Ghyll
Saturday.  Pitch tent first.  There are a variety of options. - if we have two cars:-
The basic plan is to drive to Elterwater. Leave the car at the Britannia Inn, which is reasonably safe especially at this time of year. We then walk out of the village north by road up to High Close and along the whole ridge skirting Langdale, to Stickle Tarn, descending via Stickle Gill to the New Dungeon Ghyll or Stickle Barn for early evening refreshments with meal. This is a nice walk which in winter conditions could be interesting but without any exposure.
Sunday.  Walk up Rossett Gill to Angle Tarn, Bowfell and Crinkle Crags.
If we have only one car, then on Saturday we can do the Bowfell walk, and on Sunday go up the Langdale Pikes and surrounding area.  In snow, these walks can be challenging, and for those with climbing skills, the gills or ghylls if frozen will offer other opportunities.
If you are interested in the above please contact David on chair@nunmc.org

DEREK’S SLIDE SHOW    Derek   THURSDAY 3^rd FEBRUARY 8pm

I have been interested and involved in wild-life photography for many years now, so when I started diving 10 years ago, my interest soon turned to underwater photography.

Having been fortunate enough to have dived in places like the Red Sea, Madeira, Indonesia, South Africa and Mexico, I have had many wonderful opportunities of taking photographs of some of the incredible life that is to be found underwater.

The slide show will incorporate some of my best photos from these areas.  I hope that many of you will come and enjoy your journey into the deep.

 

SCOTLAND 2005?   Colin

Any takers for the west coast of Scotland during Spring Bank? (End of May) First thoughts are for camping but you could always consider accommodation from the Gleneagles Hotel to a plastic survival bag!

There are lots of possible destinations from Glen Shiel (more Munros than can be handled in a week, and not too far from Skye if the weather is fair – shhhh) as well as Torridon or many other great areas.  To express an interest see Colin.

 

 

EUROPE 2005?   Eileen

Is anyone interested in going abroad this year, possibly in September? In the last three years we have organised trips abroad to Sardinia, the Pyrenees and last year the Picos in Spain.

If you are interested then let me know as the sooner we can book flights the cheaper they are.  I will also look into accommodation.

Ideas for destinations welcome.  One suggestion – Corsica, any others?

 

SIMON YATES LECTURE

Hinckley Mountaineering Club has booked Simon Yates of ‘Touching The Void’ fame on Wednesday 23^rd March 2005.  The lecture entitled, ‘Beyond The Void’ is at Lutterworth Grammar School starting at 7.30 pm with tickets costing £7.

To book phone Eddie (Ed) Edwards on 01455 274 174.

 

Keith Kondakor has asked me to request that all members have a look at the website and pass on their thoughts and suggestions.  Please also send in any photographs, particularly for the member’s gallery. E-copy pictures are welcome but also photographs for scanning.  Unfortunately not slides at this stage.

 

WEBSITES TO TRY

In view of the forthcoming trip to Crianlarich this selection has a Scottish flavour.

Sport Scotland Avalanche Information Service                                      www.sias.gov.uk

Munro Magic                                                                                               www.munromagic.com

This is good for Munros.  Once you get to an individual Munro it will give you an option to hear a pronunciation.  (The Crianlarich hills are in the South Central Region)

Scotland Online                                                                                            www.scotlandonline.com/outdoors

Good again for the Munros and will give the option to send a Munro E postcard.

The Scottish Mountaineering Club                                                          www.smc.org.uk

The Mountaineering Council of Scotland                                               www.mountaineering-scotland.org.uk

Represents climbers, walkers, mountaineers, and cross-country skiers who enjoy Scottish Mountaineering.

 

COLIN’S POSER

Congratulations to Andrew for being the first (and only) person to date to answer November’s poser.  Now, I realize that the question is on the tip of your tongues, but to remind any new readers -  it was to find out the third highest mountains in the UK and the World. The answers of course are Braeriach and Kangchenjunga.  Andrew’s prize is being rushed to him even as we speak – namely ‘The fewer men, the greater share of honour.’  Henry V - Act 4, Scene 3.

 

January’s poser is contained within the following story.

At the bunkhouse weekend Karen O(my wine glass is empty again)  put it to the people on our dining table that if anyone could guess her age then they would receive as a prize the choice of one bottle of home made jam from those on sale.

Colin won the prize, (though Karen’s age will not pass my lips) and I must say the organic damson jam was wonderful. However, I must now reveal that I did not win by chance, as when my turn came to guess - I knew the correct answer! Your task, should you decide to accept, is to discover how I knew the correct answer?  Only one guess per person, with a start time for answers of 8.30pm on Thursday 20^th January 2005. 

 

 

 

SOCIAL EVENTS   Michele

The social programme for the beginning of the year is just being sorted.  We intend to have some Thursday evening events at the Old Edwardians Rugby Club and other outside events.  Please let me know of any ideas or suggestions.

The following events need booking ASAP so if anyone is interested in going, please contact me by the date shown (see contact information).

Tuesday 11^th January 7.30pm

Pantomime Visit – Jack and the Beanstalk at the Nuneaton Arts Centre, Pool Bank Street. Cost only £5 per person. Alternative date 18^th January.

Friday 21^st January 7.30pm : De Montfort Hall, Leicester.

Leicester Comedy Festival Preview Night.  Tickets £15.

This trip has already been booked but it may be possible to book another small group.

Tuesday 26^th April 7.30pm : Symphony Hall, Birmingham.

Granada Symphony Orchestra, Guitar – Marco Socias.

Programme includes: Stravinsky, Rodrigo, Ravel and De Falla.

Cost depends on what seats we choose but probably £16.50.  Please let me know by 21^st January so we can get good seats.

Thursday’s at the Old Edwardians Rugby Club (Our venue if you haven’t been yet!

3^rd February           Underwater Photography presentation by Derek Walsh.

17^th March             Mountain Rescue presentation by Derby Mountain Rescue Team who serve the White Peak and Dark Peak areas.  All donations and raffle proceeds on the evening will go to the Mountain Rescue Team.

Watch this space for more events.

 

GO OUTDOORS, COVENTRY

I recently visited the CCC Outdoor Centre, Go Outdoors, Coventry Business Park, Canley Road, Coventry, CV5 6RN.  This is a very large retail outlet with lots of stock and many special offers and discounts.  They claim to be ‘The UK’s Biggest Outdoor Store’.  By purchasing a discount card for £3 per year you get at least 10% off all goods (including Ordnance Survey maps), with special offers discounted up to 50%.  Check it out on www.gooutdoors.net .  They also have shops in Sheffield, Wakefield, and Hathersage.

 

COTSWOLD OUTDOORS

See newsletter for our account number.  You will get at least 10% and possibly more on selected lines. Use the number when purchasing from Cotswold as we only benefit if we continue to spend.

 

BIRMINGHAM CLIMBING WALL

Is now sadly no more.  The word on the street is that it was sold at short notice by its private owners for development.  Birmingham climbers are now thought to be seeking venue for a new wall.  Best wishes.

 

CRIANLARICH HILLS

So if you’re on the trip to Crianlarich and you haven’t yet studied the maps of the area then shame on you.  For the rest of you landlubbers there’s also no excuse as this is a great area - so swat up now!  If you don’t already know you need Explorer 364 and probably 365 with 377 and 378 also being possible depending upon where we actually go.  Alternatively try Landrangers 50 and 51.

Here are a few Munros (mountains over 3000ft) to be thinking about while you pore over the map.  If you’re not into metres but still working in feet, then by way of comparison Tryfan is 915m and Snowdon 1085m.

The finest mountain in the area is Ben Lui at 1130 metres.  Under full winter conditions this is serious stuff. ‘The Munros’ Scottish Mountaineering Club 1999 says of the main route of ascent, ‘There is no difficulty in summer, but in winter this is quite likely to be quite a serious climb by hillwalkers’ standards.’

The SMC Southern Highlands uses similar language, ‘In winter it may be a serious enough climb to call for ice-axe and crampons, and the ascent by this route calls for winter climbing skill.’  Walking time to the summit is given as 3hours 40minutes (under good conditions) with 930 metres of ascent and 9 kilometres.

Nearby Ben Oss 1029m and Beinn Dubhchraig 978m (see www.munromagic.com  for pronunciation) may be a better bet and they are also nearer to the road. Nevertheless they still involve plenty of ascent for a short winter day.

Cruach Ardrain 1046m can be ascended from the hostel.  There is a straightforward route to the top but to make a round of it there is a potentially steep snow slope to be negotiated. There is also the option to take in Beinn Tulaichean 946m though it means retracing part of the route.

Ben More 1174m and Stob Binnein 1165m are the highest in the immediate area.  However as the SMC states, ‘The ascent of Ben More …is steep, unrelenting and not particularly interesting.’

Ben Challum 1025m looks likely.  The slopes are steady the only difficulty being navigating from the south top to the summit in poor visibility.  The choice of course doesn’t end there as there are lots more. What’s the betting however that we just happen to do some that are on David’s wish list?

WINTER MOUNTAINEERING   Eileen

According to “the experts” we are in for a cold winter with lots of snow and ice so, if they are right, there should be plenty of great opportunities to get out on the mountains to play in the snow.

Winter conditions are exciting and give an added challenge to mountaineering but also much greater added risk for the unprepared.  As with everything good preparation is the key. Most of it is common sense. The right clothes and equipment for the conditions, good route planning and an awareness of what could happen, prepare for the unexpected.

There are many good articles, books and training courses on winter skills around and it is worth while getting some training or updating your skills to get the best out of winter days. It is no good having all the equipment if you don’t know how to use them.  It’s your neck, leg or life on the line, all important bits, so look after them. Brush up too on your navigation skills, navigation when all the obvious features are covered by snow can prove quite tricky.

As well as avalanches, cornices, icy patches, white outs, brilliant blue skies, exhilarating air and fantastic scenery, other things to watch out for are Hypothermia – when heat loss is greater than heat produced.  Pack in the carbohydrates, warm drinks and keep the body well insulated.  Frostnip – superficial frostbite – caused by exposure or constricting clothing/footwear, very painful but can be cured with rapid re-warming. Frostbite – can be very serious and needs medical attention. Snow Blindness – avoided by wearing goggles or sun glasses on bright days.

Accidents happen, some are avoidable others not, and whilst appreciating that you are responsible for yourself your actions can also have a big impact on others in your party.

But, with good preparation and a little forethought you can have some great winter mountain day experiences.  Bring on the snow!!

For the benefit of members who may not be aware of Eileen’s impressive CV it includes:

MLTB (summer) 

Certificate in outdoor education (including Winter Skills),

British Association of Ski Patrollers (BASP) - Standard First Aid and Safety with additional training appropriate to the Mountain and Outdoor Environment. Ed.

 

WINTER EQUIPMENT LIST FOR THOSE SNOWY MOUNTAINS

With winter now in full swing thoughts turn to all the stuff we are supposed to carry on those winter expeditions.  It’s all a matter of balance as it’s no use having such a sack full that you can’t put one foot in front of the other, but having one poorly equipped member of a party can impact on all the others if you have to descend prematurely because someone hasn’t got mitts or crampons or hasn’t yet invested in the latest Paramo gear or whatever.  There are enough things that can interfere with that pristine snowy day in the Scottish Highlands or Snowdonia, so save up the readies and make sure you’ve got the gear.

According to Mountaincraft and Leadership, Eric Langmuir Third Edition, the following are required in addition to normal walking clothes for winter high level walking:

Map, compass, watch, whistle, torch, day rations, overtrousers, anorak/waterproof/windproof coat, balaclava, gloves, overmitts, gaiters, ice axe, goggles or sunglasses, crampons, first aid kit and large polythene bag.

Langmuir also lists a light scarf which can be useful but is not part of most people’s kit, but I would add spare battery and bulb for torch, sun cream, lip salve and flask of hot drink.

Sorry to preach, but hillwalking in full winter conditions is mountaineering, and everyone in the group depends on each other to a much greater extent than they ever do in summer conditions.  Benightment on a snow slope is not funny.  It’s dark by 5pm and that soft snow turns to sheet ice. If you’re short of warm clothing there won’t be much spare going round.  Don’t rely on other people having the gear you should carry.

Finally, according to Langmuir the leader should also carry 120ft (9mm) nylon rope, red flare, first aid kit, emergency rations, sleeping bag, extra torch batteries and large bivouac tent.

What size rucksack have you got Mr. Chairman?

 

ROUND-UP FOR NOVEMBER & DECEMBER

If your expedition or outing isn’t mentioned here, then it’s because Colin hasn’t heard about it.  Make sure this Newsletter is up to date and complete by making a full and frank disclosure - now!

Edale 6^th November

Tony, Colin and Les braved the elements to walk around the head of Edale. The mist was down at about 350 metres and it rained well into the afternoon giving us a good soaking.  I provided some entertainment by wading through slime and water to reach the trig point at Brown Knoll.  Three days later and all our boots were still wet. Thanks to Tony for navigating us around the circuit in the mist and to Les for his good company and for leaving an empty Asda diet lemonade bottle in my passenger door map compartment.

Ty’n yr-erw 12^th-14^th November

On Friday Colin, Nick and Debra went for Y Garn but ended up in the Coed Y Brenin forest.  Penros Isaf bothy was visited but Axe was not at home on this occasion.  Meanwhile Keith, Michele and Les managed to take in The Wrekin.

On Saturday Keith, Michele, Nick, Colin, Eileen, Linda (up for the day) and Karen traversed the Arans from the hill road leading to Dinas across to Llanuwchllyn.  This was the first occasion that I have been on an NMC walk with more

CONTINUES ON PAGE 6

merched than dynion and hopefully not the last.  The high ground was frozen and there was a keen wind but it remained dry.  The going was rough at first but the starting height of 546 metres was helpful.

David, Tony, Rob and Rachel got off to an early start on their planned traverse of the Berwyns from Llangynog to the Berwyn Arms on the A5. An interesting choice of route led them up steep ground and across some of the best of the infamous Berwyn vegetation. After a long time in the heather they were way off schedule, moving slower than it takes a foreign nanny to get a British passport, so got no further than Moel Sych.  Nevertheless it was a memorable day. (They should have waited for Colin!).  Apparently the going was made a little easier as a certain member of the party was jet propelled.  Since then claim has followed counter claim and accusation, but I can now reveal that anyone else who suggests that our beloved chairman farts, can expect a letter from one of m’learned friends.

The fab four - no not John, Paul, George and Ringo - but Matt, Ian, Les and Mo headed for Arenig Fawr and Moel Llyfnant.  The going was mostly easy, even the col between the hills not living up to it’s reputation as being one of the wettest in the area.  Richard and Debra made for the woods and fields not too far from the bunkhouse.  Other than that little is known of this expedition.

On Sunday Nick, Richard, Keith, Michele, Colin, Debra, Eileen and Karen walked from the bunkhouse to Foel Goch.  Many of the local footpaths were unmarked, clearly unwalked and often blocked.  On the open hillside route finding was easier though the descent was down a particularly wet valley.  It was here that Richard noticed a sheep with its head stuck in a wire fence.  Leaping to the rescue was easier than releasing the big woolly thing as it twisted and turned making matters worse.  Eventually with the help of Nick, and without loosing a finger between them, the cuddly white thing escaped, moved off sheepishly and without saying thank you too!

David, Ian, Tony, Rob and Rachel headed for Moel Siabod.  The summit was bagged, there was reported hobbling by Rob on the descent and even time for a visit to Cotswold Outdoors before the journey home. Matt, Les and Mo ascended Moel Sych from Pistyll Rhaeadr the sensible way, after second thoughts about climbing the steep woods to the top of the waterfall.

Edale 21^st November

Tony, Rob and Rachel enjoyed full winter conditions on Kinder and there were pictures to prove the point.  Lots of icicles formed a backdrop to the pictures but a great deal of care was needed due to the slippy conditions underfoot.

Climbing Wall 27^th November

The bond between youth and experience continues to develop as Rob, Rachel and Tony took on the newly improved climbing wall at Warwick University. They must have all worked hard as tales reached me of aching arms and muscles.

Kinder Edge 28^th November

David, Matt and Colin set out in the rain from Blackden on the Snake Pass road.  It soon cleared up though remained cool and blustery beyond Ashop Clough.  All snow from the previous weekend had gone which meant there was little excuse for starting the descent on the wrong path.  Putting the last of the gear into the boot, Colin walked into the tailgate of Matt’s car and ended up with a handful (and head full) of blood for his trouble.  David declined the opportunity to take on a No Win No Fee client.  Matt is having his car inspected for damage to the paintwork.

Stiperstones 4^th December

Colin, Eileen, Derek, Richard, Andrew and Keith H set off from Snailbeach walking though pleasant woodlands before moving on to higher ground. Sadly, the weather closed in and the rocky tors were far too slippy for scrambling.  The summit rocks were scaled however, before Richard found us all a pub for an afternoon drink.

Grindleford 11^th December

Tony, Rob, Lynette, Keith and Michele walked the edges testing out Robs new winter boots in the process.  At least that was the plan, but it seems that the boots were testing Rob.  There was little blood and few screams, but much discomfort.  Light entertainment ensued when our heroes walked into a sheep fold in the mist and when Rob discovered the true ingredients of the Eccles cakes being served at the Grindleford café.

Yorkshire Dales 18^th -19^th December

Richard was out with his caving club for the weekend but for some reason seems to have preferred walking with a young lady to spending the whole day down a dark hole crawling through mud and water.  On Saturday he walked from Clapham to Horton, and back by another route, whilst on Sunday Pen-y-ghent was ascended in good snow conditions.

Brown Clee and Titterstone Clee 19^th December

Keith, Michele, Les and Colin headed for Shropshire on a fine day with a fair bit of snow on the tops.  Colin’s new boots got around the course without killing his feet (very smug) and Keith made sure we didn’t get lost.

Glyder Fach 19^th December

Rob, Rachel and Tony ascended the Devil’s Kitchen from Ogwen to Glyder Fach. In places the snow was quite deep with some icy crusts.  Tony writes, “Although not really necessary, crampons were worn in order to refresh ones memory of the joys of tripping up, waddling like ducks and coping with an extra two inches projection not normally in front of ones toes.   Down climbing over snowy and icy rocks also proved interesting.   Apart from one or two hiccups, major disasters were avoided.   It was really very pleasurable to be mountaineering in the snow and bright sunshine and we all enjoyed the experience.”

Y Garn 19^th December

David and friend Eddie went up Yr Garn from Idwal and down the Devil’s Staircase.  The weather was clear and windy but very cold. Overnight snow was down to about 400m, allowing the lads to get some practice with ice axe and crampons. CONTINUES ON PAGE 7

FROM PAGE 6

Snowdonia 28^th – 30^th December

Tony, Rob and Rachel camped in a very wet Nant Peris before a much better day dawned.  Snowdon was climbed from Pen-y-pass by the Pig Track in snow and icy conditions requiring crampons.  With wind and mist, a traverse to Y Lliwedd was abandoned in favour of a return by the same route.  Time was found for practising self arrest which is more than many other very poorly equipped walkers could have done with one needing to be rescued following a broken leg.  The following day an attempt was made to climb Moel Hebog by a sporting route.  In the pouring rain and wet through (wot – in Paramo!?) a descent was made to the fleshpots of Beddgelert.

Castleton 29^th December

Keith, Michele, Richard and Colin climbed to Loose Hill in good conditions and followed the ridge to Mam Tor and Rushup Edge.  Only the leftovers of recent snow remained on the highest ground leaving a mixture of lanes and muddy fields for the return to Castleton. There was a short diversion to Peak Cavern and tea at Outerside in Hathersage. (guess who went to the pub?)

 

And that means that someone was out getting exercise on every weekend during November and December.  Can we keep that up for the New Year?

Finally, undated reports of expeditions reaching me were for Tony, Rob and Rachel going to Magic Mountain in Glossop to spend some money, Les having a few days on Dartmoor and Graham and wife reaching far flung Cambodia!

 

LET MOUNTAIN BIRDS ENRICH YOUR LIFE   Andrew

The Raven

The raven is one of the mountain birds you're most likely to see at the moment, because they live and thrive all year round in the harshest mountain environments. 

They are birds which have always fascinated man.  The Celtic warrior-goddess, the Morrigan, took the form of a raven.  The Valkyries were originally corpse-goddesses.  Their name means 'chooser of the slain' and they too were represented by the carrion-eating raven. 

Ravens are among the most intelligent of birds, and to see them in their wild home is to see a sight of nobility and grandeur.

It's not always easy to tell a raven from a crow, but there are some pointers:

• They’re very big - bigger than a buzzard. 

• Ravens are increasing their range, but they still prefer the mountains and crags.  So if you

    see a black bird above 600 metres by rocks and cliffs, it's likely to be a raven.

• Then there's the tail.  If you see a raven flying, its tail looks diamond-shaped, where a

    crow's is like a wedge.

• And if you see it in profile, a raven has shaggy throat feathers, unlike a crow.

• A raven's call is deeper and more nasal than a crow's - a deep, nasal gronk gronk.

Ravens are always tremendous fliers, but at this time of year watch out for spectacular displays and mating flights.  The primary feathers at a raven's wing-tips spread out individually like splayed fingers.  The slots between are thought to give them more control at low speeds and prevent stalling.  Ravens love tumbling around on up-winds.  In early Spring they're thinking about nesting and you'll see pairs of them doing their acrobatic courtship flight riding the up-winds in the teeth of a gale. It's fantastic - fills you with a sort of wild elation.

 

 

                                                   

 

 

RAVEN                                                  RAVEN                                  CARRION CROW

 

 

 

FOOTBALL COMPETITION   Eileen

All of the gaps in the story can be filled in with the names of football teams.

 

The sun shone ________ __________ the day we set sail on a voyage to buy spices from the _____________, aboard a ship with a _________ riddled with holes.   As we sailed down the river which ____________ to the sea, we passed a miller standing by the old _____________.

 

The _____________ was made up of Welsh, Scots and others of the ____________ race.  They were to a _________  ____________ against the ship’s first mate and sent him to _____________.  He got his own back by sending them down to _____________ the boilers, or to tie ___________ high up in the rigging.  He knew that they had helped _________ ships in the past.

 

The cabin boy Ken with his unkempt ______________ was named after his mothers favorite politician Ken ________________, although he stressed that his second name Neil, had nothing to do with the disgraced MP Mr. _______________. He was almost illiterate but Ken won our ______________ with his efforts to improve his _______________.  As writing practice he kept a note of the __________ of weapons in the gun cupboard. 

 

I was hoping the sea _______ would make my _____________.  She had not had a holiday _____________ too long and had put weight on her ______________ depressed her.  She had got a bad chill while backing a horse in the ____________, which she had put a lot of ____________.

 

We landed on the _________ of a strange island _____________ in the day.  We found a map which showed where the natives _____________ their treasure. We set off through dense ______________ where we could hear the howling of ___________ in the distance, but we _____________ regardless.

 

We started to get hungry and thirsty so stopped beside a murky ____________ to try our luck at fishing. No luck but we were cheered up by the sight of some cows.  We were told if we wanted to milk them we had to ____________ but we could not get anything, as they didn’t like their _______________.

 

Eventually we came upon a small clearing.  Some men dressed in ___________ green and looking like park __________ took us to meet their leader the _____________  ___ ______ ________.  She lived in a ____________ which she had built in the __________ __ __________ when the _________ fell down in her _________ ________.  She gave us some slices of _________ ham, ____________ buns and a large wedge of ­­___________ cake followed by a glass of ruby _________ and an _________ mint.  We were amazed to see that she had two British cars parked outside the ___________, she told us had been bought using her _____________account and cost her lots of £ ____________.                             ANSWERS TO EILEEN ASAP.  THERE’S BOUND TO BE A PRIZE.

 

THE HILLWALKERS GUIDE TO THE GALAXY AND EVERYTHING

A new usage for a word entered my vocabulary during the bunkhouse weekend - namely Gazelle.  Now according to my Concise Oxford dictionary this is, ‘any of small graceful soft-eyed antelopes of Asia or Africa,’ but apparently in popular culture (though exact definition has eluded your editor) this can also refer to the male of the species ho mo sapiens, indicating perhaps manly powers beyond which other men possess.  Now we appear to have such a man amongst men in our midst.  In my day such were referred to as Tigers but perhaps Lyons is nowadays more appropriate.

There was a time when your editor was thought to have legendry knowledge of the British hills.  This has now been dented, as on the Arans walk of 13^th November Colin allowed his group to miss out a Nuttall summit only ½ kilometre from the route. This is of only passing interest to yours truly as he bagged the offending summit some time ago, but others on the walk wishing to gather in all the 2000 ft tops will have to revisit on another occasion.  Now although mistakes were made, we must start from where we are, look to the future, put in new procedures, learn lessons but certainly not carry out a witch hunt.  Although I could contemplate an apology I think it best to follow in the footsteps of our blessed Prime Minister and not bother.

Also from the bunkhouse weekend, ‘Don’t mention the custard!!’ (Shhh, there wasn’t any!)

Now not that I’m one to gossip, but it’s come to my attention that our multi talented Secretary has a party trick which until this moment has been kept in the locker.  Apparently, my sources say, he’s been observed in a previous incarnation, leaping from a standing start to the top of a filing cabinet.  Now without documentary or photographic evidence this all remains unconfirmed and I disassociate myself entirely from such a rumour, mainly on the grounds that I would not wish to fall victim to this sort of malicious idle tattle myself.

Congratulations to Les Ball who now becomes a record breaker.  No member has previously required as many as three membership application forms before managing to fill one in without losing it.  Unless of course you know better?

Late news has also reached me and just in time for this edition that all is not well amongst the tenting fraternity. A certain lady reports that when her man has had a drink or two, the zip zipping required to exit and then re-enter in the middle of the night to said tent, multiplied by three visits, can be just a tad tedious.